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Friday, February 24, 2012

Pleased to "Meat" You, Part IX--Sudden Death

    I have gathered the world's most elite squadron of game show hosts for our meat class's epic game show showdown with the PM class (try saying that 5 times fast). It's day 9 and today we had a review day in one of the classrooms instead of our usual meeting place--the meat room. Chef Elia told us we would be playing a review game against his PM class (I call them PeeMer's) so it would mean bragging rights against our fellow friends and foes. Chef asked us if we have ever played a game where you ask questions and choose someone from the opposing team to answer it (you obviously go for the weakest links here). He continued on, explaining that it was a new game he just learned from another teacher so when he asked me if I've ever herd of it I smartly replied "yeah we played it in high school" rather than taking the wind out of his sails by telling him it has been around since I was a small child...
    The night before our group had to come up with 2 questions each, which we posted to the group's Facebook page to prevent everyone from asking the same question. Since it was review we had to keep the answers somewhat easy but you'd have to be an idiot to assume the PM class was not conjuring up impossible questions. We came up with a few 4th quarter stumpers as ammunition because we were going to war dammit!
     The game gets underway with each team racking up points off of the easy questions. Then they started getting hard. Chef Elia waited patiently while each person answered and if they got it wrong he would fling a tied green side towel at them like a grenade. It started off as a quiet friendly review game but as the clock ticked away things started to heat up. My friend Brad from the PM class chose me for his impossible 9 step question on the entire sausage filling process. Chef Elia sits down next to me duel-wielding 2 green side towels and says to me in a calm voice: "if you really wanna be my pal, you'll get this one right" I don't know this! There's 9 steps!! I give my first answer, "ANNTTT, wrong!" and am hit over the head with side towels in a drum-like fashion. Touche Bradley...
    Towards the end, the PeeMer's begun to pull away, taking advantage of our every missed opportunity. Green side towels were hurled throughout the room as students banged on their desks and roared over the other team's missed question. Every point was crucial. One kid from the PeeMer class uttered amongst the commotion "this is supposed to be review, not who can stump who" but it only fueled the chaos. Time was running out and we were down by 3 big points. Every possession, and every turnover needed to be manufactured into points for our team. If a question was answered incorrectly it could be saved to be asked again. Although no one was supposed to help each other, everyone sneakily discussed the wrong ones so they could become automatic points in the future. 
    The end was near and we had just gained momentum from Eric's epic dominance over Brad's impossible 9 step sausage question. This was it, we were now down by one. The next few rounds would go back and forth with neither team gaining points. One of my questions from earlier came up again and I had to choose who was going to answer. Everyone had discussed this one on the other team so I was basically laying it up for them to dunk in my face...I picked a kid who was looking straight at me, "LETS DO THIS!". With no hesitation the kid said, #109B (it was #109D) and the class erupted! This was the game saving block our team needed! The tables turn to us and we convert, tying the game with a buzzer beater...SUDDEN DEATH.

    The class left the room while Chef Elia conjured up the final question. Upon returning he told us to choose one representative from each team, and whoever got it right would be the winner. We elected Stonewall Jackson (Leah, one of my fellow Dream Team members) to take the final shot. Chef flipped a coin and we got to go first. It was do or die. Chef asks the question and Leah answers to the best of her ability...dead silence blanketed the room. "That's correct".

 Sorry PeeMers...

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