"No You Ahh!" EMP Edition, Part II

Due to length I have decided to break up my St. Patty's Day themed recollection of my EMP stage into two parts. Read Part I if you have not already.

    After chef Kent gave me a schooling on how to steep garlic to loosen it from its papery shell, they had me watch service from a corner to see how plates were assembled before going out. I was also placed in the Garde Manger station to taste hors d'oeuvres and ask questions. I was able to taste a few things my friends and I were given when we came to eat at EMP in January. It was fascinating to see some of the things we ate being plated and understanding how they came together. After a while Chef James Kent motioned me over to speak with him. It was the first time I saw him since my whole garlic debacle. I was toast. He explained to me that every stage has to cook for the chefs (this was the moment I had prepared for, I knew it was coming). He told me I had a half hour to cook a perfect French Omelet for him and could stuff it with whatever I felt like. I thought I would be cooking the French Omelet for him first thing in the afternoon as sort of a "Hi, nice to meet you, this is the kitchen now go make me a French Omelet" kind of thing. No, I was making the omelet at 10:30 at night, in the middle of service.
    When he said "GO" I spent the first 5-10 minutes pacing back and forth in the walk-in thinking of what to put in it...but mostly freaking the hell out. I decided to keep it simple. Nothing crazy to try an wow Chef Kent, just simple. I wanted to focus on the omelet without getting too caught up in adding crazy ingredients. Making the omelet perfectly would wow him just enough I thought. I grabbed some fresh spinach from the 1st walk-in before heading into the 3rd to grab goat cheese. I asked one of the Sous Chefs if I could borrow 2 burners to saute my spinach and cook my omelet for Chef Kent. He told me I definitely could but had to move fast since the second dinner rush was coming in. This only added to the pressure.
     I got two skillets hot and beat my eggs. Sous chefs on the line were watching me and it made me sweat big time. I had my mis en place set up and ready to go. When I dropped some butter into my omelet pan it immediately turned brown. Crap. Start over. My second go around I sauted the spinach and started making my omelet just like the Pepin video. I was visualizing every step in my head as I went along. Chef Kent came over, arms folded and watched me attempt the omelet. When Sous Chefs saw Chef Kent approach me a few of them started watching as well. "This has to be a record. I've never seen this many chefs watch a stage make an omelet before" Chef Kent said, clearly trying to throw me off my game (and doing a good job of it I might add). I could here James Kent faintly whisper to one of his Sous Chefs that it was clear I had been watching the Pepin video. I couldn't help but smile to myself that I at least did one thing right. My first actual attempt at the omelet went down in flames. The egg stuck to the bottom of the pan so I couldn't fold the sides over. It looked like dog food, and Chef Kent was watching the whole time. He told me what I had done wrong and I paid close attention so I would not repeat the same mistake. The Sous Chef on the line was subtly helping me with small details mainly because I think he wanted me off his line so he could get ready for the inevitable second dinner rush. Regardless, his assistance was integral even if he was trying to intimidate me as well.
    My next attempt I got the omelet where I wanted it before I folded in the sides to make it look oval-shaped. I put in my sauted spinach and goat cheese and folded in the ends on the lip of the pan (the rounded part). To my dismay the second fold had a small section that had browned. In a classic French Omelet there should be 100% NO BROWNING what so ever. By now I was a few minutes over my 30 minute limit and was ready to quickly bang out my last attempt but the Sous Chef told me he needed the burners for service. I had to plate it regardless. I inverted the omelet onto the plate and was told to put it on the pass with the rest of the dinner plates for Chef Kent to evaluate. Here I am, putting a sub-par French Omelet on the pass right next to flawlessly executed EMP dishes. I was mortified. 
     I knew the whole time the French Omelet was coming. I mean, I read, reviewed my notes and watched the Pepin video 30 times. I couldn't be more prepared!! There's a sharp contrast, however, between practicing it and actually making it in the EMP kitchen in front of Chef Kent. 

This is how I felt about the Omelet going into it (swagger)

And this is how I felt about the Omelet after I had finished it...(swagger deflated)

    I couldn't bare to look as Chef Kent approached me with my plate. He told me that minus the slight browning in the corner I actually did a good job. "This is good. It's nice." Chef Kent stated, before eating a sliver. One of the Sous Chefs tasted a bite and told me they've seen much worse (which was slightly reassuring). I tried a bite myself before cleaning my area and preparing for my one-on-one talk with James Kent in his office.

For the sake of keeping with the Boston/Irish St. Patty's theme...The Town

    To be clear here, it was not an interrogation, but when you in a tiny office, face to face with Chef James Kent, arguably one of the best chefs in America right now (Chef Daniel Humm was out of town for the weekend for those who were wondering where he was this whole time) you cannot help but feel intimidated. We spoke for awhile, and I told him I was looking for an externship. When he asked me where else I had staged, I was hesitant to tell him this was my first one. He said something along the lines that I had balls for choosing EMP for my very first stage. In his office I froze up again. I couldn't speak, or be myself (something I struggled with the entirety of the day). I had planned to tell him how eating there changed my life. How even a dish a simple as the veloute (a basic soup made from chicken stock) intrigued me for months. I was going to go into immense detail about that night the six of use dined at EMP but I just couldn't. I was a brick wall. I gave short answers without elaboration, and looked noticeably tense. When our talk was over I stuck around until 1am or so cleaning, and helping chefs breakdown their stations.

Imagine the last word saying "cook" rather than "cop" and that's how I felt when I left...

   I thanked James Kent for the opportunity and told him we would speak again soon before making the rounds, thanking all the Sous Chefs who had helped me along the way; mainly Tim the Chef on the fish line who I worked with most of the day.
    I left EMP at 1:30am feeling slightly defeated. I planned the entire week prior my stage and still got my ass kicked. Right from the start I was knocked off kilter and struggled the entire evening to regain my footing. My French Omelet was not as good as the first one I made way back in Skills and I looked like a fool in the kitchen. I just got rocked. I don't know how else to describe it.

    At this point I should probably point out that these two posts were not intended to shit on the EMP staff in any way or whine about a bad day I had. I am merely recalling the events of my very first stage as I remember them. I know full well that most of the time chefs were trying to intimidate me while also reminding me that the restaurant has a level of perfection they must maintain. Obviously this post makes it seem all bad, but in actuality there were a few things I did manage to do well. I got rocked but I still come away with tons of valuable experience, and knowledge. I know that as a first stage, especially at a restaurant of EMP's caliber I am going to face these trials and tribulations. I got to see one of the finest kitchens in America, if not the world, in action, and I got to work alongside some of the finest chefs. I am forever grateful to the Eleven Madison Park staff for taking me under their giant wing and allowing me to stage with them. Learning from my mistakes and working to become faster and better are things I came away with after my stage. These are things I can carry with me for the duration of my culinary career. So it was not all bad, in fact I enjoyed it. Its strange you know? You have to be a certain type of person to enjoy this stuff. It takes a certain type of bread to actually enjoy getting knocked down like that. A good ass-kickin will tell you more about yourself than a narrow victory ever will in my opinion...

"No You Ahh!" EMP Edition, Part I

One of the best-worst horror movies ever: "leprechaun"

   

    Today is St. Patty's Day and instead of enjoying the nice weather and "celebrating" my very small fraction of Irish heritage with friends I am confined to my room due to illness. A few days ago I came down with some sort of bug--hot/cold chills, sweating, headache, lack of appetite, etc. There were times where I would be freezing so I would burrow under my blanket then I would start burning up so I would have to kick the blanket off in the middle of the night.

Indeed...

     I am feeling  better minus the no appetite so I hope this is my last day of recoperation. Last weekend I did a culinary "stage" or trail/shadow at Eleven Madison Park and in the spirit of St. Patty's I will recount the events using pictures and GIF's from The Departed and other heavily Irish-influenced movies...
     Two weeks ago I tossed up a hail marry pass to Eleven Madison Park (EMP from here on out) hoping to get a chance to do a stage (pronounced "staj") with them; and maybe land an externship. Well long story short they caught my resume & cover letter in the endzone to win the game. I would be doing a stage the following weekend....
    The whole week leading up to EMP I was numb to the world. I shut everything off. I did fine in fish class, and played basketball most nights to keep my wondering mind occupied. One night while ballin' my friend Brad had mentioned he knew someone who had externed at EMP a few weekends back. "That's it!?!" I said. "You can't leave me hangin' like that! Did she say anything about it??" Brad's face switched from a laughing demeanor to one of the "your so screwed" type. He leans in almost in a whisper and says, "they made her cook for the chefs..." My heart sunk to the floor and bounced around like the basketball I was holding.
"What do you mean they made her cook for the chefs?" "Well they had her cook a French Omelette with a filling, and gave her a half hour to do it" Brad explained. "Whats crazy though" he continued, keeping me on edge every second of the way. "Whats crazy is that they didn't let her use a nonstick pan...she had to use a regular metal skillet" Immediately I thought to myself "OH F_ _K!" As if my anxiety couldn't get any greater, Brad drops a bomb on me. I'm glad he told me, though, because otherwise I would have been totally unaware I would have to do the same thing.
    That night, a Thursday if my memory serves me correctly (and it usually does), I raced back to my room after the gym and started reading up on the French Omelette we had to make in our very first Skills class with Chef Speckamp. I read over my notes, recalled any mistakes I made that day (we got to use nonstick pans though!!), and read over the egg chapter in our comprehensive Pro Chef monster-sized textbook. I recalled watching a Jacques Pepin video on YouTube where he demonstrated the proper technique for making a French Omelette back when we were in skills so I brought up YouTube, found the video and watched it over and over and over again. Video seen below if your curious (Chef Pepin does two in this video, the first is the American-style omlette and the second is the French omlette)

    "If I had to judge how good technically a chef is, I probably would ask him to do an omlette" Those are the first words Chef Pepin says in this video. I had no idea if I would have to do the same dish or not so along with researching French Omlettes, I also bruched up on Hollandaise and Bearnaise sauces and other classic French techniques to be safe. Out of sheer nervousness I watched this video probably close to 30 times before I left for the city.
    Friday afternoon I packed an entire dufflebag with everything I might need for just that one day in the kitchen. I wasn't leaving anything to chance. If I was going to fail I would at least be well equipped...I watched dozens of EMP videos and noticed they were doing a lot of plating with tweezers in the videos so I ran to the bookstore before it closed and bought a pair. On my way out of town I grabbed a bunch of produce to practice knife cuts with at my grandma's apartment. I thought of everything, and I was losing my mind.
    Finally Saturday rolled around and it was time to commute into the city. I arrived at the restaurant an hour and a half yearly, scanned the directions one of the Sous Chefs gave me and walked to the back entrace to have it down pat. While I waited, I sat in the park adjacent to the restaurant and reviewed my notes on French omlettes. I even watched the Pepin video a few more times from my phone. "This is it, no turning back" I remembered McCulley Culkin say in Home Alone before fending off the robbers. That day, for whatever reason, I was not nervous, but rather incredibly calm. Then I entered the kitchen....

Pleased to "Meat" You, Part X: Last Day

Originally this was supposed to be a 14-part series but due to budget cuts, a recent staff strike, pressures from upper management and declining viewer ratings I had to cut this segment short and end with part X...That's all made up of course, but since I had no pictures or much to talk about for the previous 4 days I decided to do one final post for this segment, give the highlights and be done with it before I move on to a new segment for my fish fabrication class. That's right, you now have a new series called Somethings Fishy (working title) to look forward to, so be prepared to laugh, cry, and be amazed by all the things I post in the coming weeks. Now, without further adieu, my final meat fabrication post....

The band is back together

    I keep posting these pictures and somehow sneaky Van Damme manages to photo-bomb almost every single one...Anyway, I've set up shop here on my bed because The Rundown with The Rock is on TV and when you have The Rock AND Christopher Walken in one movie you don't not watch it, ammirite? I'm definitely right. Ok, so my last week of meat fabrication was coming down to the wire. We had to fabricate lamb, chicken, have our fabrication practical (how practical), take a butcher's yield test final (basically shows you how much to pay for meat post fabrication and whatnot), and have our product ID final with written exam, all in 4 days or 12 hours of class time. I got a 100 on my yield test and my fabrication went extremely well the last few days. For our fabrication practical we were given a boneless pork loin which we had to split with our group partner before tying into a roast and slicing cutlets. "This is an individual assignment" Chef Elia explained before we started. "You won't have a partner to count on this time, so this is where you can show what you are made of. Now begin." Personally I thought the practical was well...practical. All we had to do was trim the fat, remove the silver skin, tie a roast, show chef, then remove the string, slice 3oz cutlets and bring everything up to chef one more time. He also wanted to see the silver skin we removed (to evaluate if we cut into the meat), along with our usable and unusable trim. We had to do those minor things, and we had an hour and twenty minutes to do it. It was sooo much time. Since it was so little to do in so much time I had to expect he was going to grade HARD so it was important to do everything perfectly.
    From the pork loin you have the loin end and the rib end. I got the rib end which has very little fat or silver skin to trim; making my job even easier. I took the time to tie my roast uniform and tight as hell (that's a good thing), and used my ruler to measure the spacing between each tie to ensure uniform spacing before showing chef. The roast was tied so tight you might as well call me the "Hyde Park strangler"...When I brought my roast up to show chef he just smiled and nodded his head in approval. At one point I thought he was gonna start laughing he liked it so much. There were no words, just an unspoken understanding that I did a great job. Phase one, DOMINATED!

For the sake of sticking with the whole The Rock theme I found the  perfect Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson GIF that accurately sums up Chef Elia's reaction to my roast tying abilities...

    

    My next task was to cut off the kitchen string and carefully slice cutlets into 3oz portions. This part is harder than it looks and chef was going to be a stickler on the weight. I sliced my cutlets (only 1 or 2 were off and not by much), assembled my tray for grading and took a deep breath because I absolutely bombed my cutlets the last time he saw them. This was my redemption baby! When I brought up my tray chef asked me why I had so little silver skin before picking through my unusable trim to see if I was hiding anything. I explained to him that I received the rib end of the boneless loin and there wasn't much fat or silver skin to trim. "That's ok, that happens", he said while feeling my cutlets with his hands. He weighed one or two and felt the rest. "This looks good, great job". *Channels inner Shooter McGavin* *fires finger guns into the air*

Secret of the pros...

    Practical was done and in the books. Now it was time to watch chef break down chickens before duplicating it for a grade. I took two chickens back to my work station and starting removing the legs, wings, and breasts. My swagger from the practical was carrying over into my chicken production because I was killing it (that's a good thing for all your older folk out there). Once I was done I arranged everything he was looking for neatly in rows and wiped down my station so everything looked SHARP. Chef Elia came over and was very pleased. "This is some of the best work I've seen in the class all day, Peter". It was music to my ears especially since I stumbled out of the gate when the class started 3 weeks ago. 

    As I said a few posts ago, one of the most important things many students here neglect to think about is momentum. You have to hit you stride at the right moment when your team is entering the playoffs. These last few days of class were some of the best days I have had here at the CIA from a production standpoint. This post was not meant for me to boast or be cocky but rather to share with you my excitement for having a few kick ass days in class.

Adventures of Detective Hahm, Part II: Tread Lightly

(It is very important that you read part I of this post if you want to have any idea what is going on in this one)
                                                                                                                                                                        

    The barely lit cigarette falls from my mouth as I sprint down the street back to the station, stopping every few hundred feet to catch watch my breath. *Wheezing* "it'll take forever to get a cab all the way out here" I thought. 20 minutes later I arrive at the station. Joyce, with her back turned is locking up the building. She turns, looks at me, out of breath and sweating profusely. Horrified she says, "I thought you went home to rest...did you just run here detective?" "Joyce...we got Mr. Gray.." *out of breath* "...its...all connected...him...Global Pala..." "who's Mr. Gray? Detective you really should lie down, you look like hell. When was the last time you slept?" "There's no time to explain, I need to get back into the office". Joyce lets out a subtle gown. "I'll put a pot on for ya" she says while shaking her head. "No you go home Joyce. It's late, I can make the coffee myself". "I'm not THAT old, detective" she replies sheepishly. "Besides, you keep smoking and not resting the way you do and in a couple years you'll look older than me!" I force a smile as she lets me into the building.
    Rushing into my office I sift through the files I collected on Global Palate after meeting the mysterious woman while hiking a few months back. Suddenly it hits me, the strange woman  was trying to warn us about something. She wanted us to find out about Global palate. *talking out loud to myself* "Where is it? Ah-ha! Here we go, global palate." *skims file out loud* "global palate, farm-to-table...does not use purveyors blah blah blah, grows own livestock and produce for the restaurant. That's how they do it! They skip the middle man and use the meat Mr. Gray was stealing from the grocery store. By getting the meat free global palate keeps labor and overhead low, turning everything into profit!" Joyce returns with a cup of piping hot black coffee. "This goes against my better judgment giving you coffee at this hour because you really need to rest, detective". "I appreciate the concern Joyce, but I'm fine." "Well I won't disturb you", she says before closing the door behind her. *picks up the phone and dials* "Stonewall, were going to dinner undercover tomorrow night...no don't ask questions. I got a big break in the grocery store case. I'm gonna bust this thing wide open and your going to help me". A half hour later Joyce finds me asleep at my desk with an unlit cigarette in my mouth.
    In the morning I am startled awake by a hand on my shoulder. It was Leah, a junior detective I recruited last night for the global palate dinner. "What were you talking about last night? Something about an undercover dinner?" "Close the door, I'll fill you in..." *The rest of the station goes about their daily business and I breakdown the case to Stonewall*

    That night Stonewall and I drive to Global Palate to check things out. "I'm checking to see if we're being followed. I think we're good for now" I say before sitting back in the passenger seat. "The part that I don't understand is, why Global Palate? They've been doing good business for years" Leah questions. "Yeah...dirty business. Mr. Gray was stealing prime cuts of meat for the restaurant so they could get it for free and sell it all for profit." *Perplexed* "But why?" "That's what we're going to find out..." We drove down a dark, narrow road until Leah spots the sign for the restaurant. "Look! There it is". We pull into a small drive way with a garage and a backyard. "You sure this is the place?", she asks. "It looks more like someone's house than a restaurant." The porch was decorated with white Christmas lights and the main entrance had a red velvet curtain that gave way to the main dining room and bar area. A server approaches and asks if she can help us. "Reservation for two, its under the name Stevenson" "right this way Mr. Stevenson".
    After our server discussed the evening specials she handed us a menu before tending to other guests. "Refer to me as Mitch while we're here, ok?", I whisper to Leah. "Mitch Stevenson? That's your cover? You might as well said 'cop' when they asked for a name..." "I don't have all the time in the world to come up with clever undercover reservation names, Leah. Just roll with it! Now order something before we draw attention." *Our server returns* "Have you had a moment to look over the menu?" "Yes we have." I ordered a turkey pot pie and Stonewall ordered a baked ham with potatoes. We agreed to share...to make it look more real.

    During the meal I observed the servers and bartender go through a swinging door that lead to the kitchen. Briefly, while the swinging door was open, I caught a glimpse of the owner, Kelly Banks, shaking hands with Tim Ryan--the president of the Culinary Institute of America down the road. "Oh my God. Leah, she's shaking hands with Tim Ryan!" "What?!? Do you think he's involved? What if its just a coincidence? He may not know what's going on" "Oh he knows, he's a part of it all." "How can you be so sure?" she questions. "I just know. Call it a hunch, call it a cop's intuition, call it whatever you like. He's involved."
    After we finished eating Leah lowers her head so others won't hear our discussion. *Whispering* "Alright, so he's involved, maybe not. But SHE IS. Lets take this place while Tim Ryan is here!" Leah cocks back the hammer of her gun under the table,  "If he's clean he'll see who he's really doing business with; and if he is involved...well that's killing two birds with one stone. Its a win, win!" "Leah, we must be patient, and for chris'sake put that gun away! This thing is bigger than we could have ever imagined. We have to start building a case now. We're only going to get one shot at this thing so we have to make it stick." "If we come out, guns blazing yeah well stir things up, but how long can we hold them? We got nothing on them! They'll walk the next day. Its a chess game Leah" "I don't play, CHESS", she replies sharply. "Alright, its a game of cards. We have the king, but we don't know what they're holding. They could have an ace in the hole." *Confused* "So how do we find out what they have?", Leah asks. "We check, and check, and check, and let them throw all the money in the pot. When its the right time we raise and take the pot!", banging my hands on the table. *Guests look in our direction and our server returns* "Have you decided on dessert?" "We'll just take the check" I reply. "Sure thing, Mr. Hah...Mr. Stevenson. I'm sorry, I must have confused you with someone else..." We pay the bill and I turn the receipt over. *Writes: "Keep up the good work..."* "What are you doing? I thought we were undercover?", Leah inquires. "Did you miss that back there? 'Sure thing Mr. Hahm'? They already know who we are. Ya see? They're starting to reveal their cards already..."

   
    Back at my apartment I start to feel dizzy so I sit in front of the television to clear my head. The room starts spinning, and everything becomes blurry. "They put something in the food" I say to myself. I could just make out a dark figure standing in the doorway before everything went dark....

Adventures of Detective Hahm, Part I: High Regard

   I started this post back in November after a hike with my buddy Zeth (read Sympathy For the Devil post to here all about it). We met a woman towards the summit with 3 dogs, and stopped to chat. We told her we were CIA students so she talked to us about a farm-to-table restaurant operated by a CIA grad called Global Palate. I began the post later that day saying I wanted to see how long it would take to finally eat there and finish the post. Last night I finally ate at Global Palate with Leah aka "Stonewall Jackson" so I was going to go into detail about my failed attempts to eat there (some days they were closed, others they were doing renovations on the place) and the meal we had, but decided to scrap the whole thing and switch things up a bit. I wrote a short story (fiction of course) about me being a detective instead. It deviates from my usual postings in a big way but I'll still describe the restaurant and meal in detail so read this segment and Part II for full analysis. Hope You enjoy....

Cool view from atop our hike. What a day...

Pleased to "Meat" You, Part IX--Sudden Death

    I have gathered the world's most elite squadron of game show hosts for our meat class's epic game show showdown with the PM class (try saying that 5 times fast). It's day 9 and today we had a review day in one of the classrooms instead of our usual meeting place--the meat room. Chef Elia told us we would be playing a review game against his PM class (I call them PeeMer's) so it would mean bragging rights against our fellow friends and foes. Chef asked us if we have ever played a game where you ask questions and choose someone from the opposing team to answer it (you obviously go for the weakest links here). He continued on, explaining that it was a new game he just learned from another teacher so when he asked me if I've ever herd of it I smartly replied "yeah we played it in high school" rather than taking the wind out of his sails by telling him it has been around since I was a small child...
    The night before our group had to come up with 2 questions each, which we posted to the group's Facebook page to prevent everyone from asking the same question. Since it was review we had to keep the answers somewhat easy but you'd have to be an idiot to assume the PM class was not conjuring up impossible questions. We came up with a few 4th quarter stumpers as ammunition because we were going to war dammit!

Bulletproof

     The game gets underway with each team racking up points off of the easy questions. Then they started getting hard. Chef Elia waited patiently while each person answered and if they got it wrong he would fling a tied green side towel at them like a grenade. It started off as a quiet friendly review game but as the clock ticked away things started to heat up. My friend Brad from the PM class chose me for his impossible 9 step question on the entire sausage filling process. Chef Elia sits down next to me duel-wielding 2 green side towels and says to me in a calm voice: "if you really wanna be my pal, you'll get this one right" I don't know this! There's 9 steps!! I give my first answer, "ANNTTT, wrong!" and am hit over the head with side towels in a drum-like fashion. Touche Bradley...
    Towards the end, the PeeMer's begun to pull away, taking advantage of our every missed opportunity. Green side towels were hurled throughout the room as students banged on their desks and roared over the other team's missed question. Every point was crucial. One kid from the PeeMer class uttered amongst the commotion "this is supposed to be review, not who can stump who" but it only fueled the chaos. Time was running out and we were down by 3 big points. Every possession, and every turnover needed to be manufactured into points for our team. If a question was answered incorrectly it could be saved to be asked again. Although no one was supposed to help each other, everyone sneakily discussed the wrong ones so they could become automatic points in the future. 
    The end was near and we had just gained momentum from Eric's epic dominance over Brad's impossible 9 step sausage question. This was it, we were now down by one. The next few rounds would go back and forth with neither team gaining points. One of my questions from earlier came up again and I had to choose who was going to answer. Everyone had discussed this one on the other team so I was basically laying it up for them to dunk in my face...I picked a kid who was looking straight at me, "LETS DO THIS!". With no hesitation the kid said, #109B (it was #109D) and the class erupted! This was the game saving block our team needed! The tables turn to us and we convert, tying the game with a buzzer beater...SUDDEN DEATH.

    The class left the room while Chef Elia conjured up the final question. Upon returning he told us to choose one representative from each team, and whoever got it right would be the winner. We elected Stonewall Jackson (Leah, one of my fellow Dream Team members) to take the final shot. Chef flipped a coin and we got to go first. It was do or die. Chef asks the question and Leah answers to the best of her ability...dead silence blanketed the room. "That's correct".

 Sorry PeeMers...

Pleased to "Meat" You, Part VIII--Abe Froman

"My how the turn tables"

    If this series were a horror movie usually this is were it starts to get too absurd and loses much of its fan base except for 80's movie buffs, and stoner college kids (woahhhh its like the killer is a metaphor for how as a society we are killing the economy...that's trippy man!), but I know my loyal fan base will stick it out till the end (I always have to watch till the end to see how it all unfolds, no matter how intolerable). We had a pretty awesome class today because we got to make sausage!!

My mom is going to make an "Osborne Cox" joke in the comment section I just know it...

    I started off the day with slicing open vacuum sealed bags with Anthony at the purge sink (purge is the blood/juices in the bag) before our class fabricated the scraps to obtain the proper fat to lean ratio needed for our breakfast sausage production (the ratio is 70% lean meat to 30% fat by the way). After we were done, Chef Elia gave a quick demonstration on how to use the sausage machine and the proper method for feeding the sausage into the casing. When he demoed the breakfast sausage he made it look ridiculously easy. Once the long 20 foot casing was filled with sausage meat, Chef Elia pinched, twisted, and spun the long sausage into a chain of link sausage like he was under a time constraint for Iron Chef. The man could move. Each sausage was linked off perfectly giving way to a long linkage of uniform sausages. "I love this shit" Elia proclaimed while masterfully linking the sausages. "Somewhere between heaven and here there's a layer of this stuff" he said with a fat grin on his face. Now it was our turn...